In Death I See Life
In Life I See Death
The Sweet Relief That I Long
The Hush Of Whispering wings
Have come to Take Me
Away, away

me
they call me verna
i have lived for 21 years
my favourite thing is emptiness
what i want most is happiness
i want to be remembered by God
i love my dead dog the most

friends?
[x].stephine.
[x]~jolyn~
[x].kavi.
[x]~shikin~
[x].catherine.
[x]~shuhong~
[x].joanna.
[x]~josephine~
[x].beiyi.
[x]~lorraine~
[x].shuping.

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Sunday, September 17, 2006
17th september: i must apologize to those whom i hurt unknowingly. sorry to have cause any harm or displeasure to you. please let me know who are you if you feel tat you need an explaination about why i did tat to you. kindly remind me about the date and time, the incident, wat you and i had been discussing earlier. thank you. sorry for all the inconvience caused.

ok. back to blogging. recently, i'm addicted to watch movie by myself. just watched 'little man' alone on monday. supposed to watch it with my friend on sunday, but i was so tired from work tat i fell asleep while waiting for the time to pass. unfortunately, my friend was upset and irritated by me. when she called, i told her why i'm overslept. she said it's ok. after five minutes, i received a msg from her saying, 'actually i'm not ok. in fact, i'm quite irritated of you.' knowing tat she felt tat i overslept on purpose, i deleted her msg, and did not reply to it. am i at fault?

though so, the next day, i went to the cinema to watch the show by myself. enjoyed it very much. hahaha~ ^^ after a few days, tat friend called me. she aked me if i'm free to go out. i told her frankly tat i dun have the mood. den she told me, 'ok! den you have fun playing your playstation!' [using a forced 'cheerful' voice] and hanged. to me, i felt tat she was sarcastic. after a few minutes she called again. asking me if i wanna go out the following day. i told her tat i'm noon shift. guessed wat she reply me? ... ... quite tough huh? she told me the same thing, 'ok! have fun playing your playstation!'

if you happened to read this, dun be offended. i'm just saying how i felt. need to discuss bout this matter? sure. contact me.

been quite tired of life, but still need to go on.. cos i dun have the courage to end it now. nevatheless, if i really do end this life, dun think God will ever accept me into His arms of comfort, love and warmth.. Father, to tell You the truth.. i really feel like ending this pathetic life of mine several times.. You knew it.. but for the sake of Your promise tat at the end of life, those who won the battle will enjoy the rewards.. to stay in a place where You will wipe away all tears from our eyes. where sins are neva to be found. where joy fills every corner of our hearts. Father, for tat promise, i'm willing to wait. to endure. to remain alive. Father, i thank you for Geraldine who you send to tell me, or rather, remind me of this promise. please bless her greatly. may she be a great servant of Yours one day.

-ah_xun faced death at 11:36 PM

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