In Death I See Life
In Life I See Death
The Sweet Relief That I Long
The Hush Of Whispering wings
Have come to Take Me
Away, away

me
they call me verna
i have lived for 21 years
my favourite thing is emptiness
what i want most is happiness
i want to be remembered by God
i love my dead dog the most

friends?
[x].stephine.
[x]~jolyn~
[x].kavi.
[x]~shikin~
[x].catherine.
[x]~shuhong~
[x].joanna.
[x]~josephine~
[x].beiyi.
[x]~lorraine~
[x].shuping.

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Wednesday, September 08, 2004
8th september : come to think of it, there's 4 guys who i really like in my life. in my pri sch, there's Y-san.. i admired him since pri. 4.. when i come to sec sch, there's M-san.. in poly, there's two [but none of them are from my poly].. namely L-san who i know through a online game.. and V-san, the first person who told me that he likes me.. so of course, V-san meant a lot in my life and he's the only guy who told me that he dun care about the size of his future gf but wat matter is the heart.. but cos that time i still like L-san, i rejected him.. some may think that i'm a flirt.. liking so many guys over the past 8 years.. i think so myself.. but the above 2 guys [Y & L] dunno that i liked them.. i was just plainly admiring them.. as for M-san, i told him.. but he didn't have any reactions.. so i take it as a 'no, no'..

the reason i wrote this was because this morning [at around 0321] V-san and i had our first chat over the phone. i was excited.. and scared [cos since the last time he so-called 'propose' and i rejected, we hardly talk at all for around 5 mth].. but when he called, firstly he forgot my name, secondly, he forgot how we met.. and the worst, he mistood me for another girl friend that he had. den here comes my conclusion for him.. V-san is not my cup of tea.. but we can be good friends cos he's easy to talk to & there's no barrier in talking to him.. but i'm hurt.. really, really hurt.. do guys only remember pretty girls? this question keeps on appearing on my mind..

now i start to wonder.. is there really such love that love songs alway come with? sigh..

may today be a good day for me.. God.. please guide me to choose the right choices in life.. and give me the strenght that i need to go through this life that You have given me.. Father.. i'm sick and tired of my love life.. give me the rest that i craved for.. may i pray for all these things in Jesus's name. Amen.

-ah_xun faced death at 10:08 AM

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